Most people switch up there beauty game periodically. Some experiment, some follow the commercials and magazine trends, and others copy off their friends. I am a strange breed. I can fall into any of the aforementioned groups but I definitely have my list of things I can not live without. I NEED my faves. I live by these products! Let's share. I'll show you my list, if you show me yours. It's only fair..
Deep Sea Cosmetic Energizing Body Scrub and Relaxing Body Scrub - What can be better than dead sea salt mixed with aromatic oils? I can't vouch that it's authentic dead sea salt but it's a great scrub that leaves your skin soft and moisturized. In warmer weather, there's no need to use lotion after you shower with this scrub.
Aquaphor - The absolute best multi purpose product! I carry a mini tube with me at all times. Great lip moisturizer as well.
Moroccan Oil Conditioner and Leave-In Treatment - Just go buy it. It's not cheap but your hair will thank you. Recommended for thick, brittle, damaged or colored hair but works as a great deep conditioner for everyone.
Redkin Extreme Anti-Snap Leave-In Treatment- Great for hair that prone to breaking, splitting and snapping off. I recommend this to all those who frequent the Dominican hair salons. I love my salon but they are lethal with that blow dryer!
Ambi Soft & Even Creamy Oil Lotion - LOVES IT! I think it's sooo hard to find a good moisturizer. Especially in the summer. This is a light enough to wear in the summer but the lotion/oil mix packs enough moisture to get you through the cooler months.
Essie Punch Pink Nail Polish - Some may say I'm boring but I've rocked this color ALL summer! I love it. It's bright, fun, and it screams fun. I get compliments on it all the time.
Phytospecific Vital Force Cream Bath - Intense conditioner treatment that hydrates and restores the natural shine and bounce. Another pricey item but hey you're worth it!
Here's one more fave:
Allure Day Spa's Douceur Therapeutic Fruit Toner and Herbal Cleanser - I use this daily. GREAT stuff! The camphor mask is another goodie. It can actually be used to treat blemishes.
Long, thick, dark brown Naturally wavy, relaxing straightens My hair has taken on many hairdos over time And throughout my life, people have always ask me about my ethnicity My heritage… I was five when my hair started to grow down my back Busted down the middle, two braids, one on each side Strangers asked: “Are you part Indian?” I’d shyly respond: “No…I’m Black.” As a teen, sporting a swinging ponytail, friends boldly stated: “You gotta be mixed!” I’d respond assertively: “No. I’m Black.” During the summers, my hair takes on a curly-Q coiffure Some inquired: “Are you Hispanic?” Puzzled, I’d respond: “Uh, no…I’m Black.” Even when it’s hanging straight down from a tight wrap and grease I’ve been questioned: “You got some Asian in you?” Baffled, I’d defiantly respond: “NO. I’M BLACK!” From my strong roots to my highlighted tips, I’ve always been aware and proud of my hairitage.
I entered this poem in a contest for Soft Sheen-Carson in 2006. Although I didn’t win, I did however receive an honorable mention for my effort. But, it wasn’t the contest prizes that prompted me to enter; it was the contest’s campaign to share our hair stories that resonated with me. The poem above is my story and may not be shared with everyone reading this. However, this discussion about our hair is LONG overdue and I hope that I am one of the few voices in changing our attitudes and views towards our hair.
I felt compelled to write this post after hearing about Chris Rock’s documentary Good Hair which is schedule to be released in theaters this October by HBO Films. Rock produced Good Hair shortly after his then 5-year-old daughter, Lola, came to him crying and asked “Daddy, how come I don’t have good hair?” Rock committed himself and set out to search the ends of the earth and the depths of black hair culture to find out who put that question in his child’s head. However, it’s much more to this documentary than Rock’s comedic one-liners and wisecracks. He is serious about getting to the root (pun intended) of how we view our hair and the effect it has on our activities, pocketbooks, sexual relationships, and self-esteem. I am glad that this documentary is exploring our hair culture; however, I’m heartbroken that it had to come to pass because a 5-year-old child was inflicted with some angst over her hair.
Like I stated before, we all have our stories and our likes and/or dislikes about our hair. For those who are not African-American and who is reading this, please understand that this is a deep-rooted issue in the black community. It stems so far back to slavery days that this single post alone would become a dissertation if I tried to cover everything concerning black hair culture. But, I won’t (well, not all in this post). I will however discuss my thoughts on this controversial topic and my opinion of how we can stop passing on our hatred for our hair to our children.
For me, I've heard that I have pretty or "good hair" my entire life. BUT this compliment never came from those in my family, but mainly from those outside of my family. There were no differences made between other members in my family or me when it came to our hair. When I was younger, I never felt that having thick, long, naturally wavy hair was a positive or a negative either way, because everyone in my family has various grades and lengths of hair. One person's hair was never considered better than another family member's hair. It wasn't until I was a teenager that I began to fully understand what "good hair" meant when it was directed toward me and its connotation.
When people would tell me that I had "good hair," often times, it was said in a negative way, usually with an eye roll. I didn’t understand why girls wanted to cut my hair in grade school. I never understood why people would say to me: “You think you’re better than everyone else” just because of my hair. It was all very baffling to me, because I didn't think of my hair as "good" or "bad" either way. I really didn't and still don’t think much about it to be truthfully honest with you, because my hair just exists. It is what it is! I don’t like or dislike my hair, OVERALL, I am happy with it because it's all mine! (And yes, my hair is all REAL! Can’t tell you how many times I’ve been asked that, but I digress…) My hair does not make me who I am, I was born with it and I cannot change it anymore than I can naturally change my skin complexion, eye color, facial features, etc. And the same goes for everyone else in our culture, no matter how hard we try. I live with who I was born as everyday of my life because I embrace my characteristics, I don’t flaunt it in a superficial way nor should I feel less confident about what God gave me because of other's insecurities about themselves.
I love being black because I believe our features are so broad and arguably more wide-ranging then other ethnicities around the world. But, when we should be embracing our culture and our looks, we are pitted against one another by our pasts, society & media standards, and sadly, each other. We all have seemingly fed into it at one point or another, knowingly or unknowingly. But, in my opinion, hair seems to be the scapegoat in addressing much deeper issues: as a culture, our “light skin/dark skin” complex and one’s individual insecurities about their own looks. This is what I have a problem with, because in my experiences the “good hair” comment towards me was almost never about me. It was never about who I AM XI is on the inside. NO! People would look at me and “perceive” me to be a certain way because of my fairer complexion and long hair.
I’ve heard it my entire life! Well into my adult years, I still hear the same negative connotations reverberate as I did in my youth. Most recently, a friend once said to me that she couldn’t have children with her boyfriend because he “had nappy nigga hair” and her family would frown upon it. She went on further saying that she and her mom were the darkest in complexion in their family, and that there were definite differences made between them and those other family members with lighter complexions. This is part of her story that obviously affected her negatively and I’m sure many others out there as well. So, I completely understand that our stories differ in that respect.
However, I would love for us to all get pass what we know of our past (I hold no ill will or grudges toward those girls who cut my hair in school) and what we see in movies and on TV. I want us as a whole to look pass what long, straight hair is compared to what shorter, coarse hair is... or to some what "good hair" and "bad hair," respectively, is perceived as. Let’s stop feeding into this babble! I know I for one completely despise it. I despise it because we are continually perpetuating it and we are passing our issues onto our children, the future generation. Now, I do not have children of my own, but I see it playing out once again through my 8-year-old cousin who is being teased right now in school because of her long ponytails. My Mom and aunt wanted me to talk to her, but I struggled the same way Chris Rock did when Lola came to him. How do you explain to them why they are being teased for being the beautiful little girls they are? How do you tell them to rise above it, and that others are “just jealous” of them? What do you tell them…and how do you stop it?
Well, in order for us to stop it, I would like for all of us to check ourselves first. Take stock within yourself. Think about what you are saying and doing and how it continues to perpetuate these stereotypes. Next, I would LOVE for all Xfactors to strike “good hair” and “bad hair” from our vocabulary. Let's just stop saying it altogether! We HAVE to move on from the negative connotation of what "good hair" and "bad hair" is. Most of us ALL have hair atop our heads and it’s either healthy (good) or damaged (bad). End of story! Because if you ask the cancer patient who is completely bald what he or she believes is "good" or "bad" hair, I'm pretty confident that he or she will say HAVING hair is "good hair."
I’ll stop here for now as I leave you with that last thought…But, this is an issue that is very near and dear to me for many reasons. However, there is SO much to cover because I've just skimmed the surface. I’d like to revisit this topic over time as the movie premiere nears and once I’ve actually viewed the documentary myself. So, this post just may become a dissertation as I explore various facets of this topic in the future (such as styling – natural vs. processed).
Stay tuned!
Now that I’ve shared me stories and experiences with you, I’d like for you to share your “Hairstory” with me! Be it positive or negative. Let’s have a very honest and open discussion and dialogue about this very controversial topic.
I love trying new skin care products. As the weather changes, I often adjust my skin care regimen to the season. During the winter months I normally use Vaseline Cocoa Butter Lotion combined with their Cocoa Butter Gel. Both of these products are absolutely fabulous as they keep my skin perfectly hydrated.
A few weeks ago I tried Vaseline's latest addition to their beauty line, Vaseline Aloe Fresh Moisturizing Body Gel. It retails for $6.00 at either Target or Wal-mart.
Ladies...let me tell you. It is great! The Aloe Fresh Gel is a combination of Aloe with Cucumber Extracts. Though I love the Cocoa Butter Gel the difference with the Aloe Fresh Gel is how it hydrates your skin without an over-shine and doesn't leave a sticky residue on your skin. This is a nice light-weight refreshing treat for your skin perfect for the warm summer weather. No more cotton fuzz on your legs either!
Needless to say you do not have to worry about moisturizing your body or fear having anything touch your legs, lol. The price is great and the product suits the needs of every skin type.
If you use this product or another product which you believe is Skinsational, email me at Xtherapist@gmail.com
Mmm, ok… So, I saw an infomercial a while ago featuring Ms. Calvin Klein Jeans, Brooke Shields, promoting…wait for it…eyelash growth treatments. (Do I hear crickets?) Yes, I said EYELASH GROWTH TREATMENTS! And yes, you heard correctly, Brooke Shields has gone from modeling tight CK jeans to modeling her own Chia pet grown eyelashes…blinking around the damn TV screen like eyelash growth treatments are cute! My mouth hit the floor! AND the FDA actually approved this treatment by Latisse, but…oh wait…you have to get a prescription from the doctor first. (Hey, doc, I know that I’ve been coughing for a few weeks, but um, can I get that Latisse?) I suppose fake eyelashes weren’t enough, huh? Some doctors and scientists somewhere felt that this was a more "natural" process. Ok, I just want to backhand slap those doctors and scientists who decided that it would be best to make people feel even worst about their looks than to create a cure for cancer, HIV, Swine Flu…hell…the common cold! I thought that I had seen it all when it came to infomercials, but this was it for me.
So, if that wasn’t enough, I googled this "first and only" phenomenon and the pictures had me freaked out! Are your eyelids suppose to look that hairy? And are your eyelids suppose to be that red and inflamed looking? Well, for those of you interested in this treatment, please be advised that it "may cause eyelid skin darkening…and there is potential for increased brown iris pigmentation which is likely to be permanent." As well as the "potential for hair growth to occur in areas where Latisse solution comes in repeated contact with skin surfaces." In XI terms, your eyelid or eyeball may fall out or come detached from your head…
Have we sunk that low and have become that obsessed with our looks as a society that someone had to go and develop a growth treatment for your eyelashes? I’m sorry, but a good tube of Covergirl LashBlast mascara (highly recommended) does the trick for me. I am NOT interested in this at all, and they just need to STOP! I mean, to each his/her own, but XI is in no way promoting this product if you’re one that is interested in furry eyelashes. Better yet, visit http://www.bellasugar.com/3323347 for a Sephora Lashstash Mascara Deluxe Sampler giveaway instead.
I’m too done! Eye candy?! HA…Girl, bye!
What do you think about this? You can get implanted butts and breasts, Botox, and now eyelash growth treatments…Is this just another penny being thrown into the fountain of youth? What’s next?
Shallow prayer - asking God or a whatever higher being you believe in for things that are superficial and irrelevant in nature.
Example: ((bowing head)) Lord please find an equally effective alternative 2 eyebrow threading...b/c it is straight from the devil but a necessary EVIL! Amen.
Ok your turn!
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